"Novel haiku will
Here be placed for you to waste
Your spare time browsing"
I am feeling smug,
Fragrant peach-blossom drifts by,
I got laid last night.
J.N.Weatherall
The sun emerges;
The rain-laden clouds disperse:
May Week is over.
C.T.Charlton
Punt-pole mastery,
And liver of stone have I:
Cambridge graduate.
If you don't like it
Bite my shiny metal ass.
Bender the Robot
My Thesis is dross,
My results are rigged and false.
BoGS will have my balls.
J.N.Weatherall
(Inspired by the Monterey Aquarium, California)
Aquarium -- fun.
Sea turtles are really swell,
if not good to eat.
E.M.Bonney
Soft ripples float by,
So do jelly-fish with stings.
No swimming for me!
Fish swim well through water,
But much less well on my plate.
I prefer burgers.
J.N.Weatherall
I have big sideburns,
I eat burgers all day long.
They call me The King.
Buy me a gold suit,
Big enough for me to wear.
And watch me wiggle.
Lard tastes really great,
With peanut butter and beef.
I am a fat-ass.
Seventy-seven,
The year I bought the big one,
Sitting on the John.
If you're a big fan of Haiku, then I apologise for my poor efforts. If not, then this is some of the best Haiku in the world. Honest.